The End is Nigh...

The Local 405 of the Doomsayers Union needed some new representatives for the Orgrimmar division. Recruitment and members willing to sow the seeds of chaos and disorder were apparently lagging in the face of political adversity from the local fascists. Plus, they pay well, and no one has to die...right now, anyways.

I have just one thing to say to any potential affiliates:

Repent, bitches.

We Interrupt this Broadcast...

...to bring you the following special report...

BWA-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!

It only took two years, but Tsurii finally got "the single coolest piece of loot in all of Azeroth." It has now been tricked out as his PvP helm...and so he can buzz the Alliance in WG while laughing maniacally at them.

Katsuko also has been enjoying life after patch 4.0.1. Not only is she sporting new threads, but she picked up a new friend and a new title.

More to come soon, but for now, we're tired...it's been a long day and we need to eat the candy that the trick-or-treaters and/or various family members didn't get to.

When Loot Filled Bags Aren't

Dear Blizzard,

We have now defeated the toothless horseman 8 times between our 2 80s. We have received one (1, I, uno, eins) Loot Filled Bag that actually has loot in it. On behalf of the rest of the Corps, I would like to suggest the following name change be made to the Loot-Filled Bag immediately (please select the one that seems most appropriate to you):

• The Bag that Sometimes Contains Loot, but Mostly Just Irritates the Commander-in-Chief
• The Bag That Glitches Your Interface Causing You to Crash Out
• Moth- and Lint-Filled Bag
• Bag of Justice Points and Continental Frequent Flyer Miles
• It's Just a Bag, it Doesn't Have Anything In It. Please Don't Email Us Anymore

Or, as an alternative, you could actually have something show up in the Loot-Filled Bag, even it's only marginally useful, so that players have some sense of accomplishment. Candy, pumpkins, toothpicks, a rock (a la Charlie Brown), anything, really.

We appreciate the Justice Points, we really do, but getting all excited over a boss' stuff, only to find it totally empty, is anticlimactic at best, downright annoying at worst. We appreciate your taking the time to read this and make any appropriate adjustments.

Sincerely,

Gen. A. Kusamoto

...And Now I'm Happy Again

The Army is back in action with new gear. And oh, what pretty gear it is. I never realized this game was so well-designed from a graphics standpoint until I got a machine that can run it effectively.

Now, as far as the game relating to patch 4.0.1...

I like it, for the most part. There are a few minor changes I don't care for, like separate friends and guild tabs and the profession filtering tools, but overall I'm content. Things I have noticed, however:

1) Pallys got beaten with the nerf stick, not just hit a few times. DPS with a Pally? Yeah, you're funny. Fight 3 mobs then heal and drink. Fight 3 mobs, heal/drink. Rinse, repeat. Mana management is impossible, and most of the really good damage-inducers are either gone or changed so much they might as well be. Healing, though, is a lot easier and costs next to no mana, which makes me glad Kusamoto is leveling Holy.

2) Mages are ridiculous. Katskuo went from barely 2300 DPS self-buffed to around 3.5k without reforging, regemming, or reglyphing. After I finished reforging and glyphing, she's almost to 4.5k...and she's wearing crafted purples and tier 9.5 stuff, mainly. After gemming, I should be at 5k+. Mages, enjoy it while you can. The nerf bat is probably coming for you, too.

3) Warrior tanking is an exercise in futility. Arms warriors seem to have gotten away with very little changed. Fury warriors got hit pretty hard, but it's still manageable. Prot? Yeah, not so much. We have one (1) AoE threat generator now, and the solo ones weren't all that great to begin with. However, shouts no longer cost Rage, and actually generate it, which is very nice.

Going to log on this evening to continue working on the Hallowed title for Kats. More to come...

Now I'm Sad...

My computer has betrayed me. I have freed up 12 gigs of space...and it is still not enough room for patch 4.0.1. Ergo, I am WoWless until I pick up my new laptop this weekend. Pity me, for my laptop is old and substandard (read the first user review).

*sigh*

Oh well. Time to catch up on Psych.

2010 1013 2306 Zulu SitRep

Hi, boss. Tsurii here. Our fearless leader, Gen. Kusamoto Esq. P.h.D. III, is slightly...um...indisposed. Therefore, I will be doing our semi-regular checkin with you. And boy, there have been some seriously jacked up things happeing in Azeroth. It started this morning when I jumped out of bed, ready to go kill in the name of good and fun...and because I really, really needing something to die. But the Sunreaver guard someone decided to post at the door to my crypt said I had to stop. Something about "the fundamental nature of the immaterium intruding on our rational world" or some such load of kodoshite. I was flummoxed for a moment, but then made the connection: Patch day. The patch. The big one you and our ambiguously gay commanding officer have been discussing. Chaos, disorder, magnetic polar reversal, dogs and cats living together, they are FINALLY coming here.

I can't wait.

But anywho...a lot has been going on with the team over the past few weeks. Firstly, we have a new recruit! He's a cousin of mine who dabbles in the dark arts...for informational and entertainment purposes only, of course. And for the sheer joy of tearing puppies into tiny shreds to summon elemental demons. Oh, and he has no eyes, but that doesn't stop him from doing some serious (spoiler alert! spoiler alert! heehee!) Book of Eli asswhuppin. 'Course...I'm better. I can do it without the blueberry...or the hocusy-pokusy frou-frou stuff. I gave him Katsuko's old clothes and staff so that he can get through the old world a little faster...plus, now he smells like a girl, which I find amusing. Hey, I'm dead; I get my laughs where I can.

Speaking of the girl, Katsuko was a little...um...miffed when she found out that a few of our buddies from Demon Knights rolled up and smoked His Licheyness a few weeks back. Miffed enough that she completely vanished for awhile. Not sure what's eating that kid. I mean, maggots are eating me, but I don't think that's her problem. But, she showed back up a few days ago with a lot of high-level gear and a very determined set to her pretty little jaw. It was hard to see behind her sparkly-new Hannibelle Lector Faceshield(TM), but I think it was determined.

As for me, I haven't had the chance to raid the remains of the Icecrown Empire State Building recently, but I did manage to find an armor vendor that had a belt better than the stupid girdle of "I'm wearing purples and you're not nyah nyah nyah" I yanked off the Black Knight's corpse almost a year ago. And I finally...finally...after going through it 500 times or so, got that whitchamacalit of souls in the forge to give up his shiny. 'Bout damned time.

Other than that, I'd been busy busting a move on Coren Direbrew once a day for almost two weeks. And you know what? HE DIDN'T DROP SHIT I COULD USE! Not one goddamned thing that was fun or needed. My groups must have summoned 300 barmaids and had a huge orgy the number of times I saw that stupid thing fall off his belt. His tankard? Shattered in a million pieces. The ram? Yeah, one of the Death Knights ate it. The Kodo rampaged and trampled all the dark iron dwarves in the hall next door after the troll accidentally gored it with one of his long-ass tusks. And yet, Kats' first run? The watch dropped for her.

>.>
<.<

Is Tsurii gonna' haveta' choke a bitch?

As far as fearless, and probably sexually deviant, leader goes...he's still stuck in the Badlands running Marudon and Uldaman over and over and over and...well, you get the idea. He's apparently seen enough cactus, coyotes, and buzzards to last him a good long while. I didn't tell him about Hellfire Penninsula...figured I'd let him find that one out for himself *evil laugh*

Well, that's all for now. My patch is done and I'm off to kill in the name of justice. And loot. OK, mostly loot. Late...

No One Puts Belfy in a Corner

Not much of an update this week, I fear, but I had to share the following pics.

First pic is Katsuko and her new favorite tank, Alvi. Why is she her new favorite tank, might you ask? Because she tanks in a dress! Yes, that's right. She tanks like a girl, and I dare you to make fun of her. Keristraza did, and look where that got her. Yes...dead.

Awwwww, she even gave our hate-filled little burninator a hug. How nice of her. Only problem with Belfs tanking in dresses? There were two other dress-wearing Belfs in the party...follow the wrong one at your peril.

Pic #2 is from the recent retaking of the Echo Isles from good 'ol Zalazane. Yes, Zalazane...the same asshole we all killed at level 10. Well, he's back and officially beating ass. Er, at least he was. Now he's so much protoplasm being played with by the benevolent Troll voodoo God of death and vengeance; which seems to be a contradiction in terms to me, but hey...I guess if you smoke enough of the really green, stinky, crunchy peanut butter, wicked voodoo God worship starts sounding like a pretty good idea.

Anywho, in the process of assisting said dark voodoo God (for Darkspear rep and gold, of course...it's not like we do this for free), Katsuko discovered she was a pretty good recruiter. Now, if only she could get them into OUR Army instead of Vol'Jins.

That' all for this week. I will try to be less lax about posting than I have been. Remembrancer Part II is on the way, as is another Army SitRep, all within the next two weeks. Promise.